mkbrantley October 8, 2020
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Hey Supreme Overlord Chatty Kathy,
I was in quarantine the last 10 days and obviously couldn’t go to work. The money I lost in
that time definitely hurt, but it wasn’t the end of the world. Yet for some reason, I still find
myself very stressed about it. I feel like my money worries trump my worries about school,
friends, etc. Should it be this way? Vibe on!
Beanstalk
Dear Beanstalk,
It’s safe to say that most college students have been given the short end of the stick during the
COVID-19 pandemic. From not being eligible for stimulus benefits to losing valuable internships, it’s
been a whirlwind of emotion. Barton’s policies for students affected by coronavirus were designed to
make the transition back to class as seamless as possible. If you don’t feel an overwhelming amount
of stress about your academics, it means the system is working. Worrying about your finances is
completely normal, especially if you have bills and other expenses. Your best option is to follow a
budget for a while until you can rebound. Just like your health, it takes some time to recover.
C.K.

Dear Chatty Kathy,
How do I deal with my RA getting too involved in my personal life?
A
Dear A,
Resident Assistants are meant to build community, enforce procedures, and keep people safe. RAs
are paraprofessionals which means they’re bound by the duality of student life and their professional
duties. Most RAs have good intentions, even if they’re a bit of a buzzkill (for good reason, too). That
being said, every student that attends Barton College has the right to “live and learn in an
atmosphere of respect and support” per our student handbook. If your RA is violating your privacy,
or being inappropriate, speak to Residence Life staff about your concerns. Barton College’s student
handbook is extremely comprehensive and can guide you through the next steps if your situation
can’t be mediated or continues to get worse. Also, be sure to document your interactions just in case
you need a record of behavior and responses.
C.K.

Dear Chatty Kathy,
I’m struggling with managing my time. What are the best ways to manage my academics so I
can still spend time with my family and friends?
Father Time
Dear Father Time,
I received the best advice when I started college from a guest speaker: treat your academics like a 9
to 5 job. Every weekday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., focus on your college algebra homework, psychology
study plans, and narrative essay outlines. Knock out your weekly assignments, which should be
listed in your syllabus or easily located under the “to do” tab on Canvas. Outside of those hours,
schedule time with your friends. Take back your weekends so you can hang out with your family. If
you have other responsibilities outside of your academics, this sentiment might not seem feasible.
Instead, block out your availability and assign enough time slots for your academic haul. Outside of
those times, consider yourself free unless you have a particularly hard or time-consuming project.
C.K.

Dear Chatty Kathy,
The guy I’ve been “talking” to wants to downgrade our relationship back to just friends but
he still wants the benefits of more than friends. I’m starting to think I’m setting myself up for
failure. What do I do?
WatermelonSugar
Dear WatermelonSugar,
I’m going to give you some difficult advice–figure out what you want before you move forward. If you
close your eyes and picture a perfect relationship packed with cute Instagram captions, dinner with
your parents, and matching outfits, and he doesn’t , then it’s time to face reality. The last thing you
want to do is spend too much time in a hopeless situation. The truth is most people will be upfront
about who they are and their intentions. Listen to them. Choosing to ignore all the brightly colored
red flags because you want a different reality almost always ends in more heartbreak than its worth.
Before you completely pump the brakes, though, communicate with him. Ask him to define the
relationship and where he sees it going. If he says something along the lines of “we can just chill”
then it’s time to let that man go. He’s clearly not what you want or need.
C.K.

Dear Chatty Kathy,
I’m worried if I get a COVID test or get quarantined that my friends will be scared to be around
me even when the time is up. It seems like people are stressed and I get it , B ut I can’t help it’s
in the back of my mind a lot. How can I stop worrying?
Not Covid Carol
Dear Not Covid Carol,
If you have COVID-19 symptoms, you should get tested regardless of people’s opinions for the
safety of everyone around you. Naturally everyone is on edge about the possibility of contracting
coronavirus. Apart from the obvious health risks, COVID disrupts lives for at least ten days. The best
thing that you can do is make peace with the fact that the sooner you get tested, the less people
you’re exposing to a similar situation. If you’re worried about your friends’ reactions, try to educate
them on how long coronavirus is contagious and keep the updated on your negative test status.
C.K.

Dear Chatty Kathy,
As a gay male, how does one accept one’s identity? I am in the closet and am scared of what
my friends will think.
Albert Einstein
Dear Albert Einstein,
Accepting yourself is the hardest thing that you will do, hands down. You’ve probably spent years
telling yourself that your natural feelings and attractions are wrong because your father uttered a
homophobic slur, because your aunt, who’s been divorced three times, told you it was morally
wrong, because you don’t want to break anyone’s heart, etcetera. Unfortunately, the list of hits goes
on and on. It’’ll take some time to figure out that you’re perfect the way you are. Accepting yourself
comes in steps. It starts by interacting with people that are part of the community. If you’re not ready
to come out, then you can always be an ally. Check out Barton’s SPECTRUM to learn how you can
contribute and meet new people that have gone through the same things. This might come off as
harsh but if your friends can’t accept you for everything that you are, then you might need new
friends. You should never feel like you can’t be who you are with your own circle. There’s nothing
wrong with the way you love.

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